Nearly every trip I manage to lose a hat, today I was successful again. Today was a designated temple and history day, so we plan to see the Grand Palace, Wat Phra Krae (the Emerald Buddha)and the Golden Mount before reassessing the rest of the day as we’re both a bit weary. After leaving the Wat Phra Krae ( Temple of the Emeral Buddha) and the Grand Palace we negotiated a tuk tuk ride with a young female tuk tuk driver for a ride to the Temple of the Golden Mount right near our hotel. It was too hot and too far to walk back in the sweltering moist heat, could only beat her down from 200 baht to 150 baht, but it was cheap. Just after we took off into the Bangkok traffic, the wind blew up and a gust blew through the steaming tuk tuk and took took my linen cap, depositing it in about 4 lanes of traffic. Goodbye cap, it was one I bought in Kilkenny a few years ago.

Back to the start, today is Monday so the traffic is back tooting and buzzing down the main road near our hotel. Another nutricious maccas, today TMM flies solo and does the order on the screens, a quick learner he is. The morning is pleasant but has the feel that its going to be really hot and steamy, prophetic forecaster that I am sitting in a sweat soaked shirt.

As we approach the Grand Palace another one of the loitering lurking touts tries to tell us that only Thai people can go in today and we should take take a tuk tuk to some shopping centre he reccommends. You feel that you can never take any help from anyone because there always seems to be some scammer trying to take you away from what you want to do. We thank him kindly for his advice and join the early lineup with a mixed crowd of Thai’s and foreigners, funny that. There are police, sock police, mask police, fan police, uniformed people of all sorts of service, temperature screens, sanitiser stations, all very clean and organised.

The Grand Palace and the Emerald Buddha are spectacular, cost to get in is 500 baht ($20) but well worth it. The Emerald Buddha is actually jade and is small compared most Buddhas. We had what we thought was a bottle water but it was actually a Japanese electrolye replacement drink called Pocari Sweat, with a slight grapefruit taste, very nice. We wander for quite a while before getting the earlier mentioned tuk tuk to The Golden Mount.

Entrance to the Golden Mount is 50 baht, its a high point with a spiral stairway. There are bells everywhere, needless to say TMM is impressed and rings a few including a giant gong about half way up. Theres also an impressive belfrey that he likes the look of, maybe a version of this coming to you soon in Brough Sreet Cobar.

The walk down the Golden Mount is slow and sweaty, its got hotter and hotter, they have misters on everywhere trying to cool visitors down but it just increases the humidity. A short rest at the bottom before TMM thinks he has a route planned to Phanfa Bridge Pier, we are close but he’s got the wrong track, Dr Google tells me so. The Navigator has a competitor for the title of Master of the Wrong Way. But we do make it to the pier.

The next bit is to catch the ferry up to Siam and then retire to the exquisite aircon at the MBK Centre. I love the ferry rides. And, MBK is cool. A KFC lunch with about 3 cups of Fanta to rehydrate, I reckon ive drunk 2 + litres of fluid but pee’d very little, the sweat is running into my eyes, down my arms, everywhere.

A little MBK shopping then, the ferry back and a well earned rest at the hotel before dinner.

We’ve moved from Khao San Road to a street with more and better restaurants, its a little tricky to find but you go down Susie Walking Street off Khao San Road and turn left when you hit the T piece. Dinner is Thi food and then I have a hour foot massage and Dale has a proper massage. I cant stay awake and so at about 10 pm we’re back at the hotel.

We’ve been pretty flat out, my feet and back are killing me, its hot and humid, and I think tomorrow is an easy day, we’ll see.

Ciao from Bangkok – Pauolo.

Its a slow start to the day, we arise at a more civilised hour. Its hot and sticky again, a real Asian tropical wet season day, a little sun, clouds and that smell that goes with rotting veggies and moist air and the sewer. What did General George Patton say, something like this “a good plan today is better than a perfect plan next week”

We had a good plan for today BUT, it doesn’t start well. We’re ready to rock n roll at 8.30 or therabouts and walk up to Phanfa Bridge ferry station, it looks awefully quiet, no boats, no girls in blue shirts and pink platform sandals, what the ….. is going on? A walk back to the street which is quiet, Dale makes a purchase at a 7-11 store and finds out the ferries have a holiday on Sundays. There’s a lonely bloke out the front of the 7-11 sitting in his tuk tuk smoking a bad looking rolly cigarette (could be a joint?), I ask how much to MBK, he says 150 baht, I say 100 baht, he says ok, so we jump in and off we go. We belt through the traffic and in no time we’re at the MBK Centre, BUT we can’t go in, its locked until opening at 10am, so we trek down the outside of the building and find a side door into Maccas, negotiate the magic screen (we are really good at this now), a wholesome breakfast of pancakes and really good coffee. We revert to Plan B and decide to head out to Chatachuk Market and get the sim cards later. So much for plans, although we don’t go too badly.

We cross the big road via the overpass into Siam Square, heading for Siam Skytrain station and find this guy sidling up to us, the standard old question “where you from?” ,our answer is “Australia mate” , he says he works in a bank and spent some time in Sydney and is on his day off today and asks what are we doing, we say ” going to Chatachuk Markets”, he says they are shut and only open after lunch and we should go to a souvenier shop he can reccomend, I say “oh yea?” and give a nod to Dale, he catches on (I think) that we know he’s a bullshitting tout and he disappears into the crowd. He ain’t no banker, hes a wanker.

Anyway we carry on to Siam Station, get the 140 baht ($5) BTS Skytrain Day Pass, and after a little analysis and hesitating we’re on the Skytrain to Chatuchuk Markets. Its about 12,000 stalls, that sell almost everything, clothes, furniture, kitchen gear, rabbits, snakes, and bells, you name it its probably there. TMM finds a bell stall, true its a shop just selling bells, big ones and small ones, normal ones and strange ones. He finds one he likes and negotiates, price starts at 2500 baht, there is no movement and we leave, there is no purchase. So after he’s procured a few items like the famous old Poo Pants for the home front, we’ve seen the snakes and other stuff and we find the way out via Section 6 Aisle 59 ( its still written on my hand) and he decides to try and find the bell stall, I think to myself “he’s f….g joking?” Well no hes not, so we go back to try and find the stall, we’re about to leave and he finds the stall. Negotiations recommence and after hes beaten them down to 1200 baht he finds himself the owner of a 1kg + bell with an elephant on it. There are inferences that I’ll carry it home for him but thats got as many legs as the idea that I’d carry taser parts back from Thailand for his brother years ago. The air conditioned Skytrain back to Siam is soooo very nice.

At MBK we find our stall and get the Thailand True Move sim cards fitted by the lady who ownes the shop, 799 baht ($33) gets us unlimited calls and data for 1 month, we test the phones with her and all works perfectly, they should also work in Laos, but we’ll see. A little more shopping, a call home via Facetime on our new Thai numbers, then its on the Sky Train on the Silom Line out to Saphin Taksin where there is a ferry station. we catch a ferr down the Chao Praya River, past the barges, Wat Arun, the Royal Palace to a pier not far from where we are staying.

There is a bar at the pier so we pull in for a beer, then find a tuk tuk back to the hotel for 2 hours rest.

Dinner is back at a street behind Khao San Road, less noise more civilised. The night is dripping humidity so we sit under cover in a bit more up market place tonight.

Its been a long day so caio from Pauolo for now.

There is a 3 hour time difference between Dubbo and Bangkok, of course there are other differences of a significant nature but this morning 3 hours seemed important. Awake at 5.30am and it felt like I’d slept in, of course I hadn’t, never do, and TMM (remember him) has the same issue, our bodies think its 8.30am. Anyway after a major sleep in we finally get on the street and head to Phanfa Pier with no idea how the rough plan will work out. The plan is to catch a ferry down the Bobenae Klong (canal) to Siam, walk to MBK Centre for breakfast, price Thailand sim cards, shop for camera bits and bobs and get the lay of the land, head up to the Erawan Shrine via air conditioned shopping centres then walk back to the klong and get the ferry back to Phanfa Bridge Pier. Then rest, then head to Khao San Road to find a place to watch Ireland beat the All Blacks (tick) and the Wallabies beat England (fail).

That was the plan. Now reality. First thing was TMM has to get some Thai Baht, there is a bank on the other side of the 8 lanes of traffic on Ratchadamnoen Klang Road outside the little hotel, TMM buggers off into the traffic, no care for his ageing travel companion, only to find that his Combank Travel card won’t convince the bank ATM to spit out cash. Serves him right. He does secure some cash using another card, however, he was sweating a bit. But, it was very hot and humid, just sayin!

We cross back over the road, then over a bridge to where we think Phanfa Bridge ferry pier is, we can see it after a tuk tuk driver trying to secure our business points it out. The pier is not easy to spot, its sort of crumbling with some young women in blue shirts and platform thongs (the foot variety) with pink flowers on them, they suggest that the crumbling dishevelved ferry clunking against the pier is the one we have to take, I’m not convinced so ask “is this the ferry to Hua Chang?”, the reply and a smile “yes yes, doan warly, is ok”. She was right, and we fly up the klong, wallowing in other ferrys bow waves, missing walls by centimetres, I poke the Gopro through a hole in the plastic roof only to nearly lose it to low level pedestrian bridge. The girl in the blue shirt and pink thongs ( I guess Bankok Ferries have these a standard PPE for staff) gives a a nod when we get to Ha Chang Pier. Its taken no time at all, we jump off while the ferry is wallowing, little concern for public safety, walk through a dark ghetto out into the street. MBK is about 5 minutes walk away, bloody amazing that it worked out. The ferry fare, wait for it, is 11 thb (baht) = 50c each.

To balance out the risk management, seeing we’ve survived the ferry we decide that the air con of the MBK KFC is a suitable place for a risk free breakfast. We buy a 59 thb (baht) light raincoat = $2 at a cheap shop as a backup to our gortex coats that are for heavy duty rain.  The 4th and 5th levels are for phones, cameras, electronics, hundereds of stalls and we find a very helpful lady who explains what we should do, which we will do, but tomorrow morning. A coffee at Maccas, and the coffee is good but we have to order using the same f…g machines we used in Sydney, lucky we know this stuff inside out by now.

The weather outside is hot and steamy, getting steamier by the minute so the walk along the elevated walkway beside the major shopping centres of Siam Paragon and Central World we duck inside for short relief from the steamy Asian heat. Erawan Shrine s a tiny shrine but clearly important, there are lots of people, security and as usual in Thailand there are people selling things like garlands off flowers and incense. There are also some traditional dancers, beautiful Thai women in beautiful dresses, dancing to traditional live music.

As we walk to what we think is the Pratunam Pier, Dale finds some clever hair bands for his daughter that are clearly a bargain, but that will be determined not by him however. The Pier is where its supposed to be, girls in blue shirts and platform thongs man the pier and the boat and after we pay our 11 baht each we belt down the klong heading towards Phanfa Bridge and if we miss diembarking its the Chao Praya River for us. We’re deposited at Phanfa Bridge Pier much wiser and I now consider us to be seasoned klong travellers.

A short rest and a cool shower, then its off to Khao San Road to watch the rugby, if we can find somewhere that is televising it. Khao San Road is quiet in daytime hours compared to last nights pulsating episode inducing laser light shows and nightclubs and bars BUT we do find a bar that has Ireland smacking the All Blacks on a screen so I know we’ll get the Wallabies v England at 4.55pm. No word on whether Thai security has an alert out for Kiwi’s with razor blades trying to cut their wrists. Some food and a few drinks and the Wallabies don’t quite make the grade, so we head off to explore the alley ways and streets between Khao San Road and the Chao Praya River. The heat is opressive, my glasses are constantly fogged (I did say fogged!), my cap is soaked in sweat, and as the day wears on my feet get a bit sore. We wind our way all the way down to the river, after TMM has a failed negotiation on a small person handbag, he needs his Aunty with him, he’d be leaving no handbags behind if she was here. The Chao Praya River is big, there are ferries, huge barges, small boats and floating debri on the river. As we wind our way back through the back streets and alleys we come on a bit of a horror scene, a crowd with traffic blocked and an ambulance/paramedic working feverously trying to resucitate somebody. Not a nice scene and we can’t help so we dodge around it, and back into Khao San Road for a largish container of Fanta to rehydrate. I do think then that the ambulance could have been for a Kiwi supporter after the All Blacks loss, but maybe not.

As we get back to the hotel, another shower, wash a few clothes, and listen to the tropical storm pounding outside, we got home just in time.

Tomorrow we head back to MBK Centre to get Thai sim cards, then a 3 day BTS Skytrain Pass at Siam Station and the catch the train to Chatuchuk Week-End markets where they have about 12,000 stalls and sell everything from sofa’s to snakes.

Ciao from Pauolo for today

Yesterday went slowly, I repacked twice, threw some more gear out, added some in, charged the phone twice, looked at my watch 20 times. Finally, relief, at 3.30 we head to the airport, checkin, security goes well for me, no alarms because of my metal knees, instead I get the full body scan, I wished the Navigator could see the scan so she can tell me what I have wrong with me, but I suspect the good Dr Reid really knows whats wrong. Despite whats on the news regarding the airlines being in a mess, QF2047 arrives early, everyone is checked in so we actually leave early and arrive in Sydney early. T2 to T1 by train, Rydges check in, healthy meal at Macca’s then after a discussion on Australian political issues TMM nods off, so I get stuck into a Candice Fox crime thriller on the Kobo.

Give me a human anytime

We’re on the plane, finally, 3-4 hours into the flight, and about to leave Australian territory. Jeez there is a lot of Australia. Not sure exactly where we are but there are a lot of big rivers below, the Moving Map is a static blank screen, technology is a treat because you dont have to deal with human beings, but more about that later, one thing The Navigator and I think TMM and I agree on.

An early start, we get to Qantas checkin at 6.15am, who said I sleep in! Now we aren”t Business Class or Qantas Club so we don’t get to go to see a human being, we get sent to a roped off pen with machines and some pleasant women to help us master the technology. I read the screen as I’m going through the process, I’m feeeling confident as just last night I mastered the Maccas ordering screen and assisted Dale with his order, but it says you cant check in power packs,you have to take them in carry on luggage, I’m warm (sweating in my Kathmadu polar fleece), I take my bag off, unlock the lock but then cant get the lock off because the cable tie is blocking it. F…..!, So calm down Pauolo, unlock the small compartment, find scissors, cut cable ties, scrummage around find battery f….g pack, tidy up, lock it all up and start the check in over again. Feel like I’ve just arrived in Bangkok, sweat trickling down my neck. Meanwhile the human help has been great, its those f….g machines I hate. Baggage check in next, this nearly brings me undone, the bag is on the scales, but thinks its a backpack (sort of is but isnt) so won’t sent it, the human help comes over and sorts it out. Glad we got there early.

Next step is through the gates of no return. The lineup is long but patience prevails, I’m jealous of the ones with kids and old people (wait…. I’m one of them!) who go through via the short line. Next step is breakfast and seeing we’ve mastered Maccas and the Qantas f…up check in we try the Maccas order screen again for a healthy breakfast. TMM (The Maintenance Man for those of you with dementia) does his first solo run on the Maccas machine, what a legend.

QF23 to Bangkok is delayed a little because catering is short staffed or their trolly broke, at least its humans and not robots loading it up. The pilot, Captain Juan Fangio Something-OrOther, assures us he’ll have us in Bangkok on time, TMM brings out the Minties with a look of doubt on his face. Lets see. As usual the food is crap, definitely not up to Macca’s standards.

The movies are not that impressive, so I switch the Bose headphones over to the phone to write this rubbish and listen to some music eg Lana Del Rey, Amy Shark, The Heavy, Billy D & The Hudoos, All Them Witches, Playing For Change, mostly blues and weird shit a lot of you wouldn’t like. This will get me to Bangkok.

There aren’t any weird or interesting people on the flight, that I can see anyway, what a tame bunch. There’s the odd person picking their nose and scratching their bum when they stand up. I know I could make some stuff up about people but you’d probably pick that, I’m assuming if you’ve read this far that you are intelligent and perceptive people. Sometimes boring is good.

The last bit into Bangkok we can see green and paddy fields, and buildings everywhere. There is a little confusion as we come off the plane trying to work out where immigration is and where you pick up bags, but oodles of Thai women in tight uniforms sort us all out, and we find ourselves with our bags at Exit gate 3-4 and sign with our names on it. a nice drive in a flash black Honda hybrid sedan to our hotel the Siam Champs Elysee Hotel. Google Mpas off line maps are treat. Its in the old Bangkok town, not far from Khoasan Road so a quick check in, sort the wifi,call home and then wander to Khoasan Road for a a meal and a beer.

The place is pumping, sort of Bangla Road at Phuket without the bar girls and ping pong shows. We find a table, an amiable waiter and order a padthai and a chicken rice stir fry with a big Leo beer each. Its stick hot, the food has a nice spice to it, the sound is abit loud but after 2 large Leo’s (a full strength Singha beer) I’m not worrying.

End of Day 1, I’ll need to sort out wifi for my Samsung tablet so I can post this with a few photos. OK the wifi doesn’t get sorted until the next morning, I think the Leo’s affected my brain a bit, at 5% alcohol. A dry mouth and a small headache convince me that if I drink Leos then only have the small ones. The room is quiet, air-conditioned, bathroom ok, beds comfortable.

So today is going to be a light day, explore Bangkok a little, catch the ferry up the klong to Siam from Phanfa Bridge, sample the BTS skytrain.

Caio from Bangkok – Paolo